As I posted, the city said we had to wear masks as we come through the door and then we can take them off. “We” voted to do that. Nobody is doing it, including me – I am not doing it because I don’t believe in it. We should have not said we would do it though. That’s the lie.
Tonight I am in a closed meeting of AA. The chairperson reads from the ancient group conscience “This is a closed meeting. Are there any non-alcoholics present?” A lady says “I’m Donna and I am an addict.” No one says anything. We go around the room and share – and she shares.
????????????????
Why do they say they are closed????
My boyfriend brings it up after the meeting…he says to me “I can’t believe they let that lady share.”
I said “I know – it’s the erosion of AA – why do they say it’s a closed meeting?
He says “I don’t get into the politics of AA.”
What does that even mean???? I need to 10th step this. It means WE LIE. AA is an HONEST program, but we lie. We think we can get away with lying.
I have encountered this with government – they make it impossible to tell the truth. If you tell the truth you get penalized. Now this is also true in AA.
I prefer to attend the meeting that says it’s OPEN because at least they are honest about that. It’s not AA, but at least they are honest… this other meeting – they have NO BALLS. And they don’t care about AA’s demise.
My BFF – his sponsor doesn’t care either. It occurred to me tonight that he is talking to me out of both sides of his mouth – like it’s the blank spot. I am not going to argue with him because I do not have the balls to stand up in the meeting with him there – and say something, nor did I bother to go talk to the addict –
Fuck it. (That’s what I used to say before I would get drunk, had I “changed my mind”.) Yup. I hope we stay sober, God.
Anonymous Alcoholics 